Food Is About Relationships.

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A nice dinner with wine. A movie with a good friend, sharing a tub of popcorn. Eating a hurried lunch across a desk at work with a co-worker. Preparing a nice family meal. Thanksgiving. Tasting someone else's ice cream cone. Bringing a treat to a small get-together. A dinner-date in a new place.

Eating alone sucks. Food, when you are alone, can possibly nourish your body, but what you crave is nourishment for your social-soul.

You eat together because it creates its own mood, its own pleasure beyond the food itself. Food is more than just eating.

So, how do you uncouple your need for human interaction with your need for food? You don't. You shouldn't.

What you need is to uncouple relationships from the pleasure of eating the wrong food.

Too often you eat too much, and you eat the wrong food when you are with someone else. The closer the relationship, the more likely you are to not follow the sensible rules you have made for yourself.

You get into one of those: "I won't follow my rules if you won't follow yours." "It's such a special occasion, I'm going off Weight Watchers for this meal, how about you?"

What we need is permission to say, "How can we both find great pleasure in this meal, and keep on the path of our weight recovery?"

Are there no pleasure foods that can keep you both going in the right direction?

Perhaps, at the end of the day, that is an important quest you and your friends can go on together: "Let's find a dozen GREAT PLEASURE FOODS and WONDERFUL MEALS we can really enjoy together."

If you don't, you will always be battling the results of the wrong foods and meals. If you don't, and, you "stay on the wagon" together, you will each have a sense of being deprived of the joys of great food with enjoyable people. Which leads to wrong food choices later. And will deepen any unhealthy relationship you may already have with food.

So, a key activity is to search for, experiment with, and enjoy new comfort and pleasure foods with your friends. Do it together. That kind of support you can each use.

When you do that you will have not only a new relationship with food, you will share new experiences with dear friends.

In the long run, wouldn't that make your day lighter?


Ideas to eat less – to live more.

VP Programs Development, ScaleDown for Life
VP Education, GoZonkers Inc.
Founder, CelebrateLifeNutrition.com
Curb Your Appetite – Stop Your Cravings
©2010 Laura Gontchar. All Rights Reserved.

Omega-3 and Omega-6 and Your Weight Loss Goals

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Omega-3 and Omega-6 fatty acids are essential in maintaining healthier body and mind. Of great importance is a proper balance between these two omegas in our diet. Both play a crucial role in healthy brain function and normal growth and development.

As these fatty acids cannot be found in the body naturally, they must be introduced to the body through our food sources.

Medical research and clinical studies show Omega-3 fatty acids reduces inflammation in the body and helps prevent many chronic diseases such as heart disease, strokes, circulation problems, skin disorders, gout, ADHD, allergies, depression, and many forms of arthritis.

The most concentrated levels of Omega-3 are found in the brain and are thought to be an important part of human cognitive and behavioral development. For that same reason, it is essential that pregnant women maintain healthy levels of Omega-3 in order to prevent nerve and vision problems in their developing child.

What are the most common foods with Omega-3 fatty acids?

• Fish (go for Wild, not Farmed, fish sources to avoid mercury and other heavy metal conteminants) – Wild Salmon, Wild Trout, Wild Tuna, Wild Mackerel, Wild Flounder & many other
• Spinach
• Seabuckthorn berries
• Acai palm fruit
• English walnuts
• Wheat/Oat germ
• Some Omega-3 fortified products like Celebrate Chocolate Truffles (2 truffles = 56mg (35%) of the Daily Value for DHA
• Avocado

VP Programs Development, ScaleDown for Life
VP Education, GoZonkers Inc.
Founder, CelebrateLifeNutrition.com
Curb Your Appetite – Stop Your Cravings
©2010 Laura Gontchar. All Rights Reserved.

Lost on the Road to Permanent Weight Loss?

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When you are full, but you decide to eat one more fork full... you think, "how can that hurt?" Right?

When you are full and you decide that one more serving won't matter that much, you can always work it off later...

When you are full, and you have eaten more than you should, so you vow to not eat so much tomorrow to make up for it...

...When these thoughts automatically pop into your head you have a persistent weight problem.


It is not the food you put into your mouth that causes weight loss problems. It is the excuses you feed into your brain.

You look for justification to eat the way you do -- excuses you feed yourself, excuses you feed to others.

You could be looking for the opposite -- you could be finding reasons to turn away that extra fork of food. You could be firm and deny yourself that extra serving. You could really monitor yourself and not overeat.

But you don't. You remain overweight because you feed yourself a steady diet of excuses.

So, you have a choice, should you eat like you want and have excuses ready? Or should you lose weight and keep it off permanently? That is the stark reality you face to achieve permanent weight loss.

Food excuses are the daily diet that feeds you all day long.
They guide your day in the same way that you have a map in your head to get around the city. So, when that internal food-voice goes silent, you get lost. You don't know what to do. You don't know which way to turn, where to stop, where to go full speed ahead.

What are you supposed to tell yourself when there is silence in your mind? Do you know what to replace the excuses with? This is when it is crucial to know how to lose weight healthily.

Because if you are going to lose weight, and stop making excuses to yourself, you have to replace the excuses with weight loss ideas that work. Ideas that, when put into action, create the permanent weight loss you seek.

When you don't have accurate, science-based information about successful weight loss, you will lose less weight than you should. And you'll gain back the weight that you did lose, plus some.

Once you regain the weight you lost, you'll get discouraged, blame your weight regain on your shortcomings and failings. And because your weight loss efforts didn't work, you'll abandon them, and you'll go back to telling yourselves lies about why it is OK to eat more than you should,

But at least, you'll not be lost -- the internal food-voice will be back. You'll still have the long list of excuses to start using again. And you'll be firmly back on the road to weight gain.

Comforting. Right?

VP Programs Development, ScaleDown for Life
VP Education, GoZonkers Inc.
Founder, CelebrateLifeNutrition.com
Curb Your Appetite – Stop Your Cravings
©2009 Laura Gontchar. All Rights Reserved.

Lose the Weight Loss Battle. The Top 5 Reasons.

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If you have battling your weight for years, it's time to give up on it. Surrender. End the war. Let peace begin.

You see, that really is the key to permanent weight loss... ending the battle.

When you are constantly at war, when there is no peace, you get lost in the battle, and lose your ability to raise up your head and see the far horizon. And when you can't see far enough ahead, into your own future, you get lost where you already are.

Weight loss efforts are too often spoken about using the language of war, the soundings of endless battles, the din of combat.

That is where the language gets you sucked-in to the wrong analogies. And you start believing the words, and not see there is a different way. You get locked into the language mentally and start acting as if the weight loss war is real.

You start thinking in terms of winning and losing battles.
You start relating to "being in the trenches". The incessant drum of the words of war assault your sense of peace, and you find none. No peace, at least not on this front (see, even "this front" is a term borrowed from wars).

When you are at war you gather 'round you the weapons of war, the accoutrements of battle, and equip yourself for the struggles ahead. You prepare yourself daily to fight, and perhaps lose skirmishes and big battles for your weight. You never leave it behind, whether at home, at work, at restaurants, at parties, or at a friend's house. You are vigilant to make make sure you are not surprised by having to eat something you know you shouldn't.

With all that clang and bang and confusion of battle rattling inside your head, you lose the ability to hear yourself. You no longer have the ability to filter out what is true and right for your body. That is where your struggles get you lost, without you understanding the best solutions for yourself.

You look to the battlefield ahead to see what can help you lose weight better, this time. You go from the "new breakthrough this" to the "old familiar that," to your friends' suggestions, to your wondering if the late night infomercials really do have something for you. Or perhaps that sexy woman online from the TV fat loss contest really does have something that works.

How can you sort all that junk out and make sense of it, if you can't hear yourself? If you can't hear yourself well, you lose your trust in your judgement, because so may things you once thought were good for your weight loss, all turn out to be worthless.

War. Battle. Weapons. Winning. Losing. Struggles.
Whew! No wonder you are tired when you wake up. Almost as tired as when you went to sleep. And you are certainly no further ahead in your ability to lose weight and keep it off permanently.

It's time to lay down the weapons of war. It is time to lose the battle.
Time to stop the insanity of pursuing the same things over and over, and never getting a better result.

Take off the instruments of fighting. Drop your weapons, and come home. Come home to you. Where you are safe and it is quiet. And peace reigns.

In a place of quiet you can hear yourself. It may be a bit unfamiliar at first, but your voice is in there. Just let your inner voice bubble to the surface. Then listen. Listen to your heart beating. It's beating right now. Listen... ... ...

Hear it? That amazing sound is your heart beating, amidst amazing silence. Peace.

You have to begin in peace if you want to be in touch with what your body is saying about your weight loss efforts. In your place of peace, you can really hear the difference between truth and bs. When you really want to energize your weight loss efforts, peace is the only way you will ever be able to know the difference between what will work for you, and what will not.

You have an amazing body. It knows a lot.
Your body knows when you feed it garbage. It knows how to make you feel great when you eat healthy regularly. You just have to listen to it.

But, after years in the trenches, at war, struggling, fighting, winning, and ultimately losing the weight loss battle, you get disconnected from your body. It's difficult to know when you are really hungry, or if something else is going on. It is difficult also to know how to deal with the cravings, and what to do to get rid of them. It is especially difficult to know when you are full, and understand why you can't put down the fork, even though you know you don't really need more food.

The war with your weight leaves scars that run deep.
Every combat veteran will tell you that the biggest, most frightening scars are the ones unseen by others – unsuspected by others – often unknown by you for many years – your very personal form of weight-loss-delayed-stress-syndrome. Like most war veterans, you won't admit it, or don't see it. Nevertheless it is real. And you will only be able to deal with it by leaving the war behind. Permanently. And know it is permanently behind you.

To a veteran, war fades slowly from memory. Your quick reflex actions of defense and aggression from the war zone are automatic for a long time. They preserved you in battle, but in a place of true peace, they are out of place, not needed, and almost always the wrong thing to do to control your weight, and make it drop permanently.

Are you a weight loss veteran, you may ask? Seem like an extreme analogy? Over-wrought?

No. Absolutely not. That may be difficult to see when you are still in the war zone. But after you have been out for a while, you will see just how difficult all those war years really were. Plus the toll it took on you emotionally as well as physically.

So, at this point of time you just need to step back, see the weight-war that is being waged around you – within you. And accept that it is time to lose the weight loss battle. That is your path to VICTORY.

The Top 5 Reasons You WILL Have Weight Loss Victory

5. YOU WILL STOP DIETING
• Dieting is the #1 reason for long term weight gain – the more you diet, the more you will gain, long-term
• Dieting disconnects you from your normal feelings of hunger, and fullness
• Dieting is the #1 cause of eating disorders
• Dieting makes you feel deprived, which increases your chance of binging
• Dieting causes your body to retain fat, and lose muscle mass

4. YOU WILL FIND REASONS TO EXERCISE 4-5 DAYS A WEEK
• It will relieve your stress
• You will burn excess calories and body fat
• It will make your body build muscle, which helps you burn more fat
• It will combat osteoporosis

3. YOU WILL STOP CHASING THE WEIGHT LOSS FADS
• You will stop believing all the hype about the latest popular weight loss programs
• You will stop looking at short term weight loss as a valid criterium for evaluating weight loss programs
• You will begin researching the world of science-based, permanent weight loss

2. YOU WILL FIND A PLACE OF PEACE
• You will engage with supportive friends, and de-stress twice a day
• You will get 7-9 hours of sleep every night, and make it a priority

1. YOU WILL STOP BELIEVING YOU CANNOT SUCCEED

Lose the weight loss war. Find peace. Achieve victory. And finally believe you will succeed at permanent weight loss.

VP Programs Development, ScaleDown for Life
VP Education, GoZonkers Inc.
Founder, CelebrateLifeNutrition.com
Curb Your Appetite – Stop Your Cravings
©2009 Laura Gontchar. All Rights Reserved.

Express your sensual self: Rule 22 To Control Your Appetite

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Your sensuality can lead to weight loss. A lot of weight loss.

Sometimes in the hurry of being a mom, a wife, a person with a job, (ditto for men) you forget that there was a time when you felt sensual. You wanted to feel sensual. Certain people made you feel sensual. You were sensual.

Let me be clear about what I mean when I'm talking about sensual: Of course there is a sexual component to sensuality, but that is not the core of what I am talking about here.

Sensuality is enjoying the pleasure of your senses. All of them. It is the acknowledgment that your body was designed – created – to feel multiple kinds of pleasure. Whether tasting or smelling, whether touching or seeing, whether hearing or combining them all in unique ways (a glass of wine with your favorite music), your senses led you to explore, enjoy and seek new experiences.

The pleasure... of knowing what day it is
So, back to being so busy you don't know what day it is... a lot of that pleasure gets lost when you live that way. It is not that the stimulus for pleasure is lacking. You just don't "stop to smell the roses" any more. Right?

It's not that you designed your life to be so crowded that your needs get lost in the shuffle. And in part, it is not because you didn't see it coming. But the needs of so many others – bosses, friends, husbands, parents, kids – all needing, craving your attention to do something for them, you really do get lost.

As your needs get submerged in the daily grind, you not only lose sight of the day of the week, (is it Thursday? if so I need to get hubby to get the garbage out to the street. Oh, wait, that's tomorrow) you lose contact with your senses.

You eat on the run, you more often smell food to make sure you can serve leftovers to the family than to enjoy the aroma. No, your senses, doing things for the sheer pleasure of them, are on hold while you weave your way through the day.

Facebook and the hoped-for adventure waiting to be lived
Guilty pleasure? Facebook for an hour before you go to bed, while your bedroom partner is watching TV. You need that, that connection. Connection not just to old long-lost friends and distant family members. You need that contact to your old self, your "self" when life was an adventure waiting to be lived.

In sharing with your old friends, if you pay close attention, you are recalling the feelings, the pleasures, even the tastes and smells of those day long gone by. You use the words of pleasure describing old scenes (he smelled of Old Spice, those roses were wonderful, you wished you had grandma's great pie recipe).

Well, you are living that adventure now. What you didn't count on was it doesn't feel like much of an adventure, does it? Challenging. Stressful. Tiring. Satisfying. But, adventure? Nah.

Somewhere along the road to living your dreams you got sidetracked. Something got missed. Not that what you have now is bad. Just that it’s not entirely what you expected. Somehow along the way you dialed down your sensual self. No time for it. No energy for it. No space for it to enliven your day. Certainly no place for your sensual self to bloom and discover wonder in the ordinary, nor experience the extraordinary.

Gaining weight while missing your dreams
Over the years, while you were dialing down your sensuality, you probably were dialing up your weight. If you take some time to fully reflect (of course you may have to wait until late Tuesday evening before you get a break to be able to do so), your weight and your sensuality are connected. Moving in opposite directions. Perhaps you may not have thought about it that way. But, it's true.

Your body is a mirror to your accumulated life experiences, to be sure. But your body is also a projection of your future – what you expect from your next years. If you knew you were going to be running a marathon this time next year, wouldn't you change your body dynamics today?

If you knew you were going to be alone, partnerless, would you begin to focus more on your body now? If you know nothing big is likely to change in your life, what's the moving incentive to change your body today?

That is not to say that you neglect your body. Nor that it isn't important to you now.

Your body reflects your expectations
It's just the realization that your body reflects your future expectations more than you probably realize. And at this point of your life, your body has turned down its expectations of feeling sensual again. But that can be changed.

If you want to lose weight, and keep it off permanently, your sense of sensuality is going to change – has to change.

Why? Because you need to matter to yourself to lose significant weight and keep it off. You need to discover your sensual self, explore and expand it. Your body is more than just something that needs to drop a few pounds. You have to focus on the beauty that you may have ignored for too long. Because sensuality is the route to finding the deep motivation to stay on track to lose significant weight.

Gaining weight loss motivation
If your only pleasure in weight loss is seeing the scale move down a little at a time, you are going to suffer motivational set-backs. Especially if you are on one of those diets that make you eat like a rabbit and sacrifice your favorite treats (don't they all?). You are going to feel deprived. Denied. Restricted. Limited. And when you are feeling that way you need to balance it by increasing your pleasure along the way.

Losing significant weight is not as easy as just consuming fewer calories.

Losing a lot of weight, which can take months to do it and still be healthy, is a challenge to your will power to stay the course. No matter what program you are on, your emotional commitment is going to take a strong beating at times. And the ONLY way to get though that is to have already begun a path of rewarding yourself with pleasures each step along the way.

Find pleasure – lose weight
Otherwise, when the going gets tough (and it will at times) the pleasure you will most likely seek in those weak moments is to overeat – to binge on exactly the wrong foods (other than Bugs Bunny, no one gorges on carrots). Plus, you just set yourself back several weeks in your weight loss plan. With that blown, further discouragement sets in, and the cycle WILL repeat.

The preventive measure is to learn, re-learn, permit yourself to find pleasure in living, smelling, touching, tasting, seeing, and being loved again. And to do it now, to make it a habit BEFORE you experience the long haul of trying to lose significant weight.

You need to feed your body's senses, if you are going to be depriving your body of calories.

The emotional process of losing weight, the path to weight loss motivation, to losing a lot of weight, is going to have to go through you being willing to be sensual once again. Joyfully accepting your sensuality.

Your sensuality will lead you to weight loss. A lot of weight loss.

Don't believe me. Try to lose a lot of weight and keep it off without increasing your sensuality. Oh, yes, you've done that already. We all have. All of us. Now it is time to justify you taking the time, and effort, without guilt or apology, to smell the roses, eat great chocolate, to experience once more – to express once more – the perfect kiss.

How do you control your appetite?
Conclusion 22: Express Your Sensual Self

Next article...
How do you control your appetite:
Rule 23: Eat Grasshoppers with your Cereal


VP Programs Development, ScaleDown for Life
VP Education, GoZonkers Inc.
Founder, CelebrateLifeNutrition.com – Satisfy Your Hunger
©2009 Laura Gontchar. All Rights Reserved.